Am i missing something?

Posted: June 3, 2008 in Random, sex ed

Last friday I overheard some 2 jamaas talking about this new place here (I didn’t catch the name) which has some ‘mad’ & ‘tight’ shows. Apparently the girls of that place dont leave anything to imagination!

They were talking about a strip joint/club



I have never been to a strip club and I beg to be educated as to what is all this hullabaloo all about.


Back in Nai these clubs seem to be the ‘in-thing’, A must-visit though i have heard the shows are not all that.


But what’s the point?


Someone would risk to go to some place huko downtown Nairobi sijui Munyu road with his big Mercedes at odd hours of the night just to see some chic dance on pole in all manner of undress displaying some boobies?


Pardon my naiveity but I cant understand.


And yes i am MAN. Or did my creator overlook some ‘chip’ when he was assembling me?


3N blogged about his experience when he visited Liddos…. , Kip gave us tips (his notebook became useful) of DO’s & DONT’s if you ever get to visit a strip joint, Bryjoe, a chic, has been there…. so has Zax where he got an offer am sure he’s still mulling over and one day he may just part with that 1000….LOL


Now i ask myself, why should i torture myself? Yaani I go pay to stare at some woman then get my adrenaline and testosterone running on a high and come back home with a king-sized boner and no one there to help me calm Johnny but a cold shower? How is that worth it?


Am i missing something? Or is this one of those experiences that you ‘got to experience’ to ‘GET’ it? Huh?

So if you do visit SJ’s, hebu educate me

I gather  that Men love strip joints for some few reasons (not exhaustive).

  • It’s the only place you get to see many real life naked women – I think this plainly demeaning!
  • The man gets to satisfy some sort of fantasy and get to be near/close to his ‘fantasy’ – Naked Beautiful women.
  • It’s like a live version of the sexual escapades they dream about at night.
  • It has a calming effect – HOW NOW?
  • It makes them happy – HUH?

And as being educated, can my readers of female gender persuasion tell me how they do feel about their men – boyfie/son/hazi/mbuyu – going to strip joints?

Can it be considered a form of cheating?

Oh Jamaas, if you please, describe a lap dance – explicitly – kenyan style. 

  1. sultrynutter says:

    Hmmmm …
    Fortunately for me I have never dated men who like to frequent these joints. I have however, heard female arguments for both sides.
    Not cheating:
    – Men have wandering eyes thus and therefore at least u know where his eyes are wandering and if its a legit joint they man wont get sex! so all he is doing is looking.

    – Well there is some other woman rubbing all up on his dick, with her body boobies, and all her various accesories, while vigorously dancing- its not only exotic, but erotic. as long as its erotic n with another mama its cheating!

    Where do I fall …. in the “i’m still trying to figure it out” category.

  2. bomseh says:

    Sultry, don’t say u have never dated men who frequent these joints. It’s only that their cover is not blown yet.

    On my part I have only visited one strip joint in Durban, but the naked women were white and to me they resembled raw sausages, so I didn’t get my adrenalin rushing. I guess black strippers are another thing. Voluptuous and all. XS just try it and report on your findings, si u are always doing one research or the other on women?

  3. prou says:

    A chic friend offered to take me to a strip club. I WILL take the offer to see for myself critically almost academically, what it is all about. Am sure it does nothing for me, the females in my life are always in various stages of undress when we are together especially at each other’s houses I do not see how doing it on a pole will make a difference.

  4. Kirima says:

    It seems from your tone that you are missing something! LOL!
    There are no strip clubs in Embu lakini I have been to one in Nai for curiousity but was too chicken to try a lapdance and I won’t make it a habit. I believe some forms of Erotica can be used to improve a couples intimate experience but if both parties are agreeable so if you cannot go with the missus or tell her about it then it might be wrong.

  5. pinkmemoirs says:

    I went to one, there was nothing to write home about, other than the fact that I was shocked at the ogling by men. I didn’t think the female body is so fascinating. If my man wants to go to these things, then by all means go, but it shouldn’t be habit… just like the porn thing, he’ll do it anyways whether I allow or not. Kwanza you forbid him, and he’ll go out of his way to do it.

  6. Seasons says:

    I have been to one but not in Kenya and it has white women and like Bomseh- they(9 white women) do nothing for me.

    I would like to visit one here but their locations are way too dangerous for me

  7. 31337 says:

    dude, are you all right? i would come feel your forehead but that would be a tad weird.

  8. acolyte says:

    I’m in the durty South and we have among the best strip clubs in the country but I too am yet to visit one. When I told peeps that they looked at me like I had a fever. I do agree that for many men who go there, that is the closest they shall have a naked woman to them.
    Plus there is just the erotic and naughty nature of things there that attracts people to go that is why you shall even find straight women there.
    But I agree with you, why get all heated and ready to go and then go home to an empty bed or your hand and a bar of soap? Strip clubs I’m not in a rush for………

  9. Kirima says:

    Oh and BTW if you are thinking of visiting one of the clubs in Nairobi my advice is don’t especially with the crackdown we saw on TV recently I’m sure it will be highly embarrasing to be exposed in that way. This is to add to the hazardous locations they happen to be in

  10. savvy08 says:

    I also wonder what it is that guys go to see? isn’t it a bit perverted? i wouldn’t want my guy going to strip joints…imagine a bunch of weirdos looking up at ur “….” and sticking (50s? 100s?- i can’t imagine anyone giving more than that..). i think SJs should just be shut down, speaking of which, there was some news ati cops raided some strip club and arrested people…like it would help tame the rot in was just another piece of senstational news

  11. Zax says:

    mmmmh, Curiosity, just like what’s probably disturbing you sent me to one of those joints… thank God the crackdown hadnt checked in yet. My desire to know what goes on and what it feels like was the major reason… besides seeing some loose nyamaz jumping around some table of course… And it was the one and only time i went there…

    So, I didnt get the naked lap dance quite… but my pal, Pierre, got one serious lap dance. Basically, the chic dances over your face… (I mean the goods) as she zungusha’z herself on the pole, she then dances around your hip joint rubbin them goods at your goods… and with 1,000, well, i dont know exactly how far one can get but some touching is involved!

    Then, there is this story i heard of a stripper @ Barells, huko Langata where they buzzted guyz juzi, ati she wekaz, as in inserts into her goody goody that ka-bottle of like White cap light or black ice or Heinekenn… u know its kinda small…, then pours the beer huko ndani as she stands on her head, then turns to her legs and wajinga walevi dash their glasses to her thingy to chota the beer that drips from there!!! Of course parting with some 100 bob for a tip… kubaff…

    That curiosity cant kwisha my guy, try visiting one and just see for yourself.

  12. KK says:

    Woi… things have changed eh! When I went to SJs years back it was not a strip joint…. but it was close.
    As for strip joints…. Been to a couple. Couldn’t get over the fact that you couldn’t touch… not in my state anyway. That and the fact that some of the dudes next to me were old enough to be my father…. and grandfather. Black, white… as fascinating as the female body is, the whole act gets boring after a while.

  13. petesmama says:

    Like porn, I think stripping gets old after some time. I wouldn’t mind my man going, as long as he doesn’t come back singing how he is in love with a strippa – yo!

    But I cannot underestimate the importance of visual stimulation either, so if anyone is giving pole dancing lessons, let me know.

  14. sultrynutter says:

    Bomseh, those are swaliz u ask upfront – so that u know wat u are getting into.

    Halafu, that storo of Zax ati chic mwagas the beer where… Hmmm I see infections lurking ….

    And how are they busting people?! Thats the wrong question-which prominent person was busted? Is stripping illegal in Kenya? and the way they are busting people for going to strip joints why can’t they uses those forces on security! Siasa ya Kenya!

  15. sisbigbones says:

    One of my big downfalls is that I’m not bashful, and my ever curious self decided to drag my boyfriend to a strip club last year so I could see what the hype was all about. So, we got in (apparently it’s free cuz they assume you’ll be spending a lot of $$$) and took our seats right next to the stage. This was a full nude club. I looked around and was observing the crowd that was there. Most of them were middle-aged men, wearing suits (unhappily married?) and a handful of college boys. We were the only black people there, and I was the only female non-stripper. There was a private room in which men were getting lap dances for $20 dollars (not sure how long the lap dances last).

    After about 30 minutes, I was bored out of my mind and we left. See? Nothing to all that hype. So, you’re not missing out on anything. I believe this is a normal part of life and being curious, but if you make it a habit, that becomes a little questionable, especially if you’re in a relationship.

    As for strip joints in Nai, I’d rather die of curiosity.

  16. bomseh says:

    @Prou – can I hang out with your friends?

  17. savvy says:

    huh? Zaxs, are u sure that story is true????

    i quite agree that strip clubs are like porn, u get addicted if u’ve got no life…
    get a life!

  18. 3N says:

    bila shame…..

    my first strip joint experience was at 18, fresh after my bday coz in stato they strictly check ID. I have to say it was so so — white mamas– but still I was raw and ma excitos were mingi. I did get a lap dance and it was nice, chic just dancing around your face and rubbing her goods all over you….so obviously you are giving her a standing ovation and tip after.

    since then….

    for starters I have done approx 4 white strip joints (forced to coz of bachelor parties) and they do NOTHING for me. As in I will just stare at how the patrons and the strippers are exchanging sexual tension for money. other than that I just sip on my drink and wait for it to end. and the strippers bug you too much, its ridiculous if you ask me.

    alafu Kenyan strip joints…

    i have to admit I haven’t had enough time to go around and see what’s there but from Liddos, Velvet (not sure if that’s the name – plus I was plastered when I went there), chillers and kadhaa i was also dragged to…I have to say I am amazed with Nai strip joints.
    1. the patrons don’t tip and when they do its really low tips (if it wasn’t for aibu they would throw coins on stage). i wonder if the strippers are on salo
    2. the strippers are hot, hotter than ‘raw sausages’
    3. there is no limit to what the Nai strippers do, I have seen things that a child of a good mother should never see in his lifetime
    4. whenever I have been dragged to a strip joint I have been in a crowd that had at least 1 chic so I am also spending quite some time observing her reaction to the nudity galore
    5. Strip joints are overrated, there is not much and after 2, 3 or 12 you have seen everything you can see.

    All in all I would advise anyone who is of age to experience it at least once. avoid dingy ones like the ones on the other side of Nairobi.

    I don’t think I am getting to one again…unless of course someone drags me there

  19. savvy08 says:

    quite an experience, 3N..

  20. Peter says:

    Why visit these joints?
    I’d rather watch a movie in my crib.

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