Jimmy Tales

By now my readers, you know Jimmy has a screw (or 50) loose in his resemblance of kiongoz.

As usual we are at our locals and our throats are having an orgasmic experience as can best be administered by a cold tusker….. *nostalgic*

Jimmy Blunts “you know people assume that guys with big tongues give the best ‘heads'”

Immediately I knew a juicy story will follow soon – I excuse myself to get  a refill (hapa ni self service, nunua kwa counter, kunywa wherever, popote unapotaka)

When I get back I ask “So who or should I say which lady made this assumption?”

He laughs and continues. “Actually its not a lady, Its Marto – our mutual buddy”

Am lost.

He narrates. Apparently Marto had flown out of the country and had requested Jimmy to drop him at the Airport using his car (Martos). After this task and since it was a Friday, Jimmy decided to pass by Nairobi West to help Uhuru finance his over inflated Budget through EABL.

After one too many, Jimmy decides to head home. With help of ‘askaris’ he locates Marto’s Car.

Now Jimmy is a good driver, during the day & while sober. Marto assumption was he can still drive while inebriated. This is what he (Jimmy) was referring to with his ‘big tongue analogy’.

Am disappointed.

So what did he do?

He gets in into the car and before he blackouts, he calls and engages services of a ‘break-down’ who tow him home.

He arrived safely.